I waste so much of my time looking at other people’s lives and wishing mine was like theirs.

Where they’ve been, their clothes, what make up they’ve bought, where they’ve eaten, where they live, what car they drive, what they do for a job. My fear of missing out has taken over so much that I’m forgetting what to be grateful for about my own life.

I literally refresh the facebook, instagram and daily mail apps on my phone over 100 times a day and now I’m consciously thinking about it I’m actually really embarrassed. It consumes so much of my time, like watching uneducational television, that I’ve decided to make an effort to record all the times I’m living my life to the fullest and all the things that I’m proud of or grateful for.

I always think about what I don’t have, what I want, the way I wish my life could be, I never think about what I do have, what I’m doing and why I’m doing it.

For the past 6 months my head has been in the clouds. I’m a creature of habit, and I’m bobbing along letting time pass me wishing I’d have done things that I haven’t because I’ve chosen not to be productive, sit in my room and refresh social media or watch another unstimulating program on TV.

In Ibiza we watch the sun rise and the sun set. Everytime I see this I’m grateful for experiencing another day, and also excited for what the next day has to bring.

Here I’m so stuck in my routine one day to the next, that I forget about the simplest things.

Am I happy? What have I accomplished? What good has come from today?

I can’t love my life until I begin to love myself.

Taking some time to consciously appreciate what is going on around me, setting some goals and making the most of my life is what I need to be doing. Not worrying about how it’s perceived through the eyes of a stranger on instagram.